Hi my name is Nicholas Liebmann and I've been obsessed with technology ever since I saw the movie Spy Kids. In college I wanted to study Computer Science however never had the grades. When I had to declare a major I was told the next best alternative was a math program referred to as Computational Mathematics. I applied and got rejected because the Math department required students to have above a cumulative 2.0 GPA in Math. I think I had a 1.87 GPA. I've been a terrible student for as long as I can remember. In school I mainly got C's although had failed tons of classes. I failed Calc 2 four times. I got caught cheating on my very last final exam in college. I shouldn't have my degree however was given the choice by my university to either be expelled or receive my degree with the agreed upon phrases "Cheater" and "Academically Dishonest" plastered all over my Transcript.
Taking shortcuts, cheating, and lying on my academics got me to my Spring semester of 2018. At this point in my life it was the 2nd semester of my Junior year and just beginning my upper divisions yet still not in the Math program. Reality began to present itself so decided that if I did not pass all my classes then I would drop out. Of course, nothing changed until, I received the lowest midterm grade of my entire life. My test score was the lowest in the entire class actually at a whopping 8% with the next lowest score being a 31%. Continuing to try and weasel by in life figured I would go to office hours and beg for any help that I could. At a jam packed office hours session got absolutely torn apart by my favorite teacher of all time Professor Roger Dodd. He read my like a book and within seconds realized how little work I had done for his class and let me have it. He screamed in my face for a solid 2 minutes filling me with embarrassment, humiliation, and disgust. In that second of silence when he was done I realized I had nothing to say because he was right about everything. While standing with my back against the wall I saw no purpose to try and conjure a lie or excuse as it was a time of reflection where it became clear that I was and had been doing nothing. I had been doing absolutely everything except trying so immediately left Professor Rodd's office and went straight to the library.
I figured the best starting point was the textbook so rented it out and found myself a seat. I opened it up to page 1 and saw equations, letters, figures, numbers, and very few words. The decision that changed my future was the one I made there at the 2nd floor seat at the MLK library. The text looked impossible to read so figured my options were to quit and say adios to college or try a little by giving it my best or just figure it out. I spent 3 days in the library trying to read 1 full page. I wanted to quit an uncountable number of times however didn't want to fail even more. Reading the page wasn't good enough and understanding wasn't acceptable either because in my mind if I struggled with page 1 then I could only imagine what the rest of the book would be like so made my intention be that I had to read and understand everything on that page with 100% certainty. I don't really remember everything I did in my time at the library but I do remember the moment I finished reading page 1 and just how proud I was of myself.
Learning from that point forward became addicting and my passion with the library becoming my training center. At the brink of COVID-19, I was just 3 weeks into my final semester of college. I was given my Academically Dishonest B.S. Degree in Applied Mathematics of May 2020. My dream had always been tech so in June 2020 made it my personal goal to make that happen! I taught myself software engineering by referring back to my old college's BS programs, locating the SE major along with its class requirements, then worked my way down that list while making note of every courses' textbook. I spent 2 years reading all 18 textbooks and then the next year coding to ensure comprehension and practice the craft. I never found a job and to be completely transparent within the 3 year time period never even made it past the 2nd round. I had proved myself to be a liar and cheater academically so wanted to at the very least prove to myself that these attributes about me were not true by earning a job in a field that I had no prior knowledge of because in such a highly competitive field the only way to truly earn a spot is by putting in the work.
Of all the dumb ideas I've had in my life that was by miles the dumbest. Lying and cheating are what made the tech industry what it is and for those looking to make the initial break-in it's a dog eat dog world. I support the competition and taking the risks of doing what needs to be done as that's business it's just for me personally not what I want. I spent 4 long miserable years of my life trying to do literally anything I could to get a job and ultimately failed. The difference between this failure and my Linear Algebra test was that this time I had something to say which was that I tried my best and really believe I could've been a phenomenal engineer the truth is I just never got the chance which sucks... but is ok! I've proved to myself that I can accomplish anything and even in the face of failure stayed true to who I wanted to be.